Page 164
Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2023 10:04 am
and it keeps coming. I mean, you have no idea. I seemingly talk like any other person. I look the same as any other person, but what is inside me is no longer human at all, no matter how it seems to you. I have the same hands and feet, and I seem to speak a common language, but I am completely different from an ordinary human.
You can’t even imagine what kind of firmware I have. You can’t even imagine how I see through my eyes. Imagine that you would turn into, for example, a fly. This is the same thing: Fly’s eyes are divided into these honeycombs. Well, there are a whole bunch of them, and they perceive everything in a completely different way. Imagine, I see everything this way. My mind and perception work like this: my vision is not from this planet. I go back with my attention to five years ago, or ten years ago, or fifteen years ago, just to compare what I was and what I am now. It’s scary what I am now. It’s not me at all; it’s mind-blowing. And even though I don’t rule over anything now, and no one has personally contacted me yet, I’ll say this: I’m already an alien. I move around, do business, travel around St. Petersburg, and I look at people and understand that I am no longer with people at all. I don’t see them. How can I explain this to you?
This is an incredible sensation, unreal. It’s the same as if you are flying on a flying saucer five meters above the road, above the city and above people, and you always seem to be flying in it with your friends, and suddenly you decide to go down and walk on the street, and people are walking, and you are looking at the people with your eyes bulging. Imagine, I look at people like this. Well, this is real, and the most interesting thing is that people feel it, too. When I go somewhere, I look like everyone else; I speak like everyone else. But our rhythms – and it’s why I’ve always said “you, people” – do not match at all. That is, it feels as if I’m looking down at people from somewhere very high, and they are somewhere down there, and they are all the same; they have all kinds of fears and incomprehensible values. It’s all so small, as if life is like a grain of sand. That is, their whole life, the whole meaning of their life from birth to the end of their days – it is like a single grain for me, like a seed in my hands, in my fingers. Are you with me? As if I took a seed with two fingers. That’s how it feels. I don’t gloat or delight, no. It’s like a little bit of fear from the realization
You can’t even imagine what kind of firmware I have. You can’t even imagine how I see through my eyes. Imagine that you would turn into, for example, a fly. This is the same thing: Fly’s eyes are divided into these honeycombs. Well, there are a whole bunch of them, and they perceive everything in a completely different way. Imagine, I see everything this way. My mind and perception work like this: my vision is not from this planet. I go back with my attention to five years ago, or ten years ago, or fifteen years ago, just to compare what I was and what I am now. It’s scary what I am now. It’s not me at all; it’s mind-blowing. And even though I don’t rule over anything now, and no one has personally contacted me yet, I’ll say this: I’m already an alien. I move around, do business, travel around St. Petersburg, and I look at people and understand that I am no longer with people at all. I don’t see them. How can I explain this to you?
This is an incredible sensation, unreal. It’s the same as if you are flying on a flying saucer five meters above the road, above the city and above people, and you always seem to be flying in it with your friends, and suddenly you decide to go down and walk on the street, and people are walking, and you are looking at the people with your eyes bulging. Imagine, I look at people like this. Well, this is real, and the most interesting thing is that people feel it, too. When I go somewhere, I look like everyone else; I speak like everyone else. But our rhythms – and it’s why I’ve always said “you, people” – do not match at all. That is, it feels as if I’m looking down at people from somewhere very high, and they are somewhere down there, and they are all the same; they have all kinds of fears and incomprehensible values. It’s all so small, as if life is like a grain of sand. That is, their whole life, the whole meaning of their life from birth to the end of their days – it is like a single grain for me, like a seed in my hands, in my fingers. Are you with me? As if I took a seed with two fingers. That’s how it feels. I don’t gloat or delight, no. It’s like a little bit of fear from the realization