Alexandr Korol

Even the photos on social media, and I’d think, “Is that me? How could I even have posted something like that?” Seriously, that happened. And when I would wake up again and that light would reappear, I would, of course, immediately restore order. I’d return to spirituality, to the “cosmos”, to books, to all that magic. But it was always so strange — because during that time, I would’ve already built a social-material world and environment, and they all liked me while I was just regular Alex. But then I would become this magical writer again, and everyone would look at me like, “Who even are you?” I’d say, “But I’ve always been like this.” And they’d say, “No, you’re kind of weird.” And that’s it — everyone would start scattering again. But then all the creative, spiritual, soulful people would return — those same ones who got scared off when my light faded. What is that about? I mean, earlier I really did think maybe I had done something wrong. But I hadn’t done anything. And over time, I started being more alert to all of it and began to notice in myself that it really all happens out of nowhere. And I thought, “Well, at least, thank God, it’s not my fault — because I didn’t even understand the cause.” It’s like having one Wi-Fi hotspot, say a material one — figuratively speaking, because there are many worlds — but let’s say one of them is this material hotspot, and everything in your focus is material: values, desires, everything. Material doesn’t mean sinful — I mean good material things. Like buying a boat, fishing, maybe opening a shrimp company like Forrest Gump. You want to see people, build a family, things like that, maybe call your parents. And then at some point — bam — they switch you back to that spiritual Wi-Fi. And people are calling you, but you don’t want to talk to anyone; you just want to be alone, maybe write in your diary or reread it, or just look at yourself in the mirror and really feel yourself. Because it’s like someone else was on autopilot before, but not you — and now you’ve just woken up. I start remembering that whole “Alternative History,” everything that happened to me back then. I start remembering all my friends who have heart, who I can talk to about higher things, and everything changes again. I won’t talk about how things are now — I’m describing how it was during the time of the first volume of “Alternative History.” Now, of course, everything is becoming clearer and clearer, and I describe all of that in my other volumes of “Alternative History” — it all gets revealed and decoded there.