Alexandr Korol

nothing had changed. But the first signs, the first sensations that something was different about me — that I was turning into some other version of myself — were that since April I have been unable to wear black clothing, I just couldn’t. It began to seem dirty to me, even though before, quite recently, I liked oversized black T-shirts, some oversized black jeans. And now I cannot wear them. I want something more fitted first of all, plus or minus, but preferably fitted. Of course, not too much — people still choose clothing to suit themselves, everyone has a different body shape. And I want light clothing, I want some light blue, pale little shirt, a white T-shirt, maybe some shorts. Dressing entirely in white is also bad — that’s an extreme. Well, for example, red shorts or blue shorts, some white sneakers or tennis shoes, and I also want some kind of blue or red cap, but not black. And, in addition to that, absolutely not vintage — rather, it should have that sense of freshness. Freshness, lightness, and kindness. And I naturally understand that I have almost none of these things, and I start thinking about how this can happen by itself, and this applies, accordingly, to all people, all readers — how we can fail to notice when a substitution happens. That is, when we find ourselves in some world or some universe, we don’t know it. We still do what we like, do what we feel, do what we think. And we develop a new personal measure of feelings: what is good, what is bad, and we believe in it, because we feel “this is bad,” we feel “this is good,” we feel “I want this,” we feel “I don’t want this.” And it turns out that over some long period of time I wanted black. And I didn’t even notice it from the outside — that I only wanted black, and that all my light-colored clothes had disappeared, that I had given them away or sold them. And this happened by itself, by sensation, without noticing or understanding at all what was going on. And then, you know, in April, it was as if I woke up, as if the old me had died — that world and that me. And I found myself in another, new multiverse since April, where I have completely different feelings, different attitudes toward people, and people have different attitudes even toward me. As if I changed and the world changed, and everything became so kind. And at the same time that everything became so kind, everything is still so bright, and I want everything to be so bright. And I start remembering