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[Alexandr Korol]

— I’ve been talking to the voice. You know that sometimes I talk to the voice.
— Well, and what did the voice tell you?
— Imagine this: the voice told me that while you might be wrong about
everything — and that you’ve done plenty of bad things and so on, which
both you and I already know — I am also wrong. And I was shocked by that.
They told me I was wrong because I reacted incorrectly. Because if I am...”
I didn’t use the word “deity” then, of course, so as not to confuse him,
but I said, “...since I am of high status, both as a person and as a boss, my
behavior was wrong. It was very negative, very sharp. I shouldn’t react
so sharply. Even if people are wrong, I shouldn’t fuel the fire of conflict.
Perhaps I should react differently — maybe just fire someone silently, or
conduct an educational talk in a completely different ‘wrapper,’ so that it’s
actually pleasant for the employee, rather than just rubbing their nose in
what they’ve done. Everyone suffers from the old way because it contains
so much negativity and tension.

In that moment, I desperately wanted to say: “Of course, I wasn’t the
initiator; you know perfectly well who was.” But I caught myself. I restrained
myself and didn’t say it. I could literally feel those old habits — those “stabs”
of mine — trying to manifest through me. And why did I want to say it so
badly? Because it’s the truth: if this person hadn’t committed all those
transgressions, I wouldn’t have been angry, and therefore, there would
have been no negativity. He is the prime source. I wanted to scream
that, but I held back because I knew it would be an attack. He would start
defending himself, say something nasty in return, and that would be an
even bigger blow to me: “How can this be? Again? What kind of injustice
is this?!” And I would have lost my temper. So, I made a pause. I listened
to the voice while sitting there with him. Naturally, I began to react softly
to everything, refusing to provoke the employee or escalate our dialogue.
I continued explaining to him:

— If I want to be a physically and psychologically healthy person — if I don’t
want to destroy myself from within — then I must learn to react differently.