Page 445
Posted: Wed Feb 11, 2026 2:05 pm
He was so aggressive because he was so afraid; so you understand how much
fear he was in, how much his nervous system was exhausted by everything
happening in the world, that he couldn’t restrain himself and yelled
hysterically at my acquaintance. I tried to explain to him calmly and kindly:
“Please understand, he isn’t sick, he’s always like this.” But you should have
seen the eyes of all the other people in that train car. They too... something
was wrong with them. They were terrified that they, too, would all be killed or
beaten, that this man would soon get to them. I also clearly remember being in
a hospital or a clinic where people were lunging at each other simply because
one person was standing in line and another person stepped a bit closer.
Most often it was women, and they were ready to just kill someone. They would
literally grab people by their clothes, push them, and scream. It was so extreme,
as if they had nothing left to lose. I saw this with my own eyes.
I remember very well how people from all over the world tried to find my
contacts to get in touch with me. These were artists, celebrities, businessmen,
and politicians. It was so unusual that in those moments when someone
finally managed to reach me, they spoke to me as if we had known each other
our whole lives, like childhood friends: there was no status, no pretension
about who was cooler, who was lower or higher; it was so open, without
masks. They asked me: “Alex, I remember you wrote in your books and talked
about how something would happen in the world in the future, and that
you were very worried about it. That you’ve been waiting for it your whole
life. Is this it? Is this what happened?” And I’d say: “I don’t know. Probably
not.” They’d ask: “Why not? It seems like this is it. It means you predicted
everything. You said something would shake the whole world.” I replied:
“Yes. I wrote about it in books, and I’ve felt it since childhood, as if I see
such a future.” But primarily, I also simultaneously believed that after this,
there would be some kind of happy future; a Golden Age would arrive.
That it would mostly happen on the territory of Russia. What would happen
exactly? I didn’t know. Maybe movies had somehow imposed a stereotypical
representation on me since childhood. I said: “I thought there would be
a cataclysm, a meteorite, maybe a volcano, an earthquake, something of
that sort.” But again, I was simply giving my feeling that kind of “cover.”
I couldn’t have known there would be a pandemic, because I didn’t even know
fear he was in, how much his nervous system was exhausted by everything
happening in the world, that he couldn’t restrain himself and yelled
hysterically at my acquaintance. I tried to explain to him calmly and kindly:
“Please understand, he isn’t sick, he’s always like this.” But you should have
seen the eyes of all the other people in that train car. They too... something
was wrong with them. They were terrified that they, too, would all be killed or
beaten, that this man would soon get to them. I also clearly remember being in
a hospital or a clinic where people were lunging at each other simply because
one person was standing in line and another person stepped a bit closer.
Most often it was women, and they were ready to just kill someone. They would
literally grab people by their clothes, push them, and scream. It was so extreme,
as if they had nothing left to lose. I saw this with my own eyes.
I remember very well how people from all over the world tried to find my
contacts to get in touch with me. These were artists, celebrities, businessmen,
and politicians. It was so unusual that in those moments when someone
finally managed to reach me, they spoke to me as if we had known each other
our whole lives, like childhood friends: there was no status, no pretension
about who was cooler, who was lower or higher; it was so open, without
masks. They asked me: “Alex, I remember you wrote in your books and talked
about how something would happen in the world in the future, and that
you were very worried about it. That you’ve been waiting for it your whole
life. Is this it? Is this what happened?” And I’d say: “I don’t know. Probably
not.” They’d ask: “Why not? It seems like this is it. It means you predicted
everything. You said something would shake the whole world.” I replied:
“Yes. I wrote about it in books, and I’ve felt it since childhood, as if I see
such a future.” But primarily, I also simultaneously believed that after this,
there would be some kind of happy future; a Golden Age would arrive.
That it would mostly happen on the territory of Russia. What would happen
exactly? I didn’t know. Maybe movies had somehow imposed a stereotypical
representation on me since childhood. I said: “I thought there would be
a cataclysm, a meteorite, maybe a volcano, an earthquake, something of
that sort.” But again, I was simply giving my feeling that kind of “cover.”
I couldn’t have known there would be a pandemic, because I didn’t even know