Page 128

[Alexandr Korol]

I tell you how to learn how to be conscious but in the same matrix. How not to fall asleep but to be in the matrix, just like in the film “The Matrix”. I’m telling you this now, and if you go back there, you’ll float, you’ll fall asleep, you’ll drown in clouds. You can’t do that.
Back to the question – is it a test or a temptation that I am now faced with the choice of being all social or not? It’s part of the journey, for sure. That’s the way I see it. It’s part of the journey and of course there’s probably a million different variations and decisions on how I should decide. Maybe I should just disappear from everyone, just rent a flat in some city or country. Once again, disappear from everyone completely. But Big Alexander says I can’t do that. But he can be a test and a provocation, and anything is possible. He is part of the system, just as everyone is part of the system. And maybe it’s not that it’s impossible, but maybe it’s true, I should be in society, but it’s as if the system and all these extraterrestrials, Freemasons, are watching how I will behave in this society again. Maybe they think that now I’m going to get lightheaded, in a month I’ll forget them and I’ll want to start a family. And they’ll hit me on the head. Maybe they will. Maybe that’s what they’re testing me for. Maybe they’re testing me to see if I’ll go back to drinking and pizza and parties. Maybe they’re looking at that measure of everything. Maybe they think I’m going to start posting on social media and showing off my life again, getting down on people again. But that’s what they want. It’s the way of development. You go through it. I’m going through it, but I don’t understand what’s necessary or what’s right. Imagine how unusual that is. Okay, when you are told to do this, not to do that, imagine how easy it is. It’s so easy for you. I’m the one who’s always giving advice in books, and they don’t even tell me what’s right or wrong – you choose. Can you imagine the position I’m in? It’s kind of scary. They tell you:

– Do whatever you want.
– What do you mean? What do you want me to do?
– That’s up to you.
– Tell me what is the right way.
– There is no right or wrong.