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[Alexandr Korol]

A few days ago, I was texting with my friend Masha Mikh — well, actually, she just asked me how I’m doing and what’s new. I told her that I’m working a lot, finally finishing the last final edits of the fifth and sixth volumes, and that I still need to work on the seventh and eighth volumes. The most interesting thing is that I’ve encountered uncontrollable irritability, and I’m now fighting it, trying to understand it to free myself from it. I don’t understand where it came from, but I realize that every person has their own weaknesses, and this is my current trial. I talked with Big Alexander, and he has told me more than once that this is Mara, who, let’s say, tested Buddha before he was supposed to awaken. So it turns out I’m going through the same thing now — that this is the final trial before awakening, before enlightenment. And it’s the hardest part, because everywhere it seems or feels like everyone wants to hurt, insult, or humiliate you — or not just seems, but really everyone starts acting that way. Everything you come into contact with — if you don’t leave the house, provocations happen right at home. If you’re online, all those situations happen online. Even if you only communicate with one person, through that person all these situations happen to me. And right now I’m going through this trial. What’s funny is that I was simultaneously reviewing my fifth volume, and many times in that volume I mention that the last thing I need to get rid of and free myself from is... I called it different things at different times. There were moments when I wrote about hearing the main God, or that He showed me myself in the future, and that I seemed to control nothing. Like I’m so relaxed, like I’ve let go of the situation, and that this is what I’m supposed to reach. So the main God has been showing me this over the course of, I would say, even a year — that the primary task, once I am fully open and awakened, is that I will stop controlling my team, stop worrying about them, stop controlling people, stop controlling relatives, and just let everything go its own way. But right now I can’t do that, because if I let go, everything will collapse. Really, everything will fall apart: then my books won’t be published, won’t be printed, won’t be released — there will be nothing at all. But something has to happen so that this becomes the ultimate faith, so that I trust and believe in the system, and that it will be like that. Then, later, when the main God was showing me that I need to become like that, the trials began — those I experienced in Nepal from December to