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[Alexandr Korol]

the presentation conferences. That’s how life will be. I will tolerate all evil people and hold myself together so as not to snap and darken my soul. If they hurt me deeply, I might let go and get drunk as it used to be. Then, I will scourge and punish myself again. Then, I will meditate and pray. So, just the simple life of the writer Alexandr Korol. I will stay home for my birthday. Do you know how I celebrated New Year? I was alone at home. I was alone for my birthday, too. I am not allowed to have a party and can’t have a relationship. Friends have families and their own lives, and most are having fun in Bali, and I am not allowed to go there. Why? Because people recognize me, while half of them want to destroy me. This is my life. Just wonderful. Would you like to be Alexander Korol? I wouldn’t recommend it. I can’t go against it. I didn’t choose this life. I wanted to be an ordinary boy all my life. But this is my destiny, and I can’t avoid it. I tried a thousand times – I can’t dodge it. I am a hostage of this all. It’s the same as Jesus. When he was born, he was told that he must preach about things people will try to kill you for. They will throw stones at you, and you must continue. People will hurt you and your family, and you must go on. They will kill you. But this is your mission, and you must keep going.” I am the same, just with the books. He was crucified, but I am not yet. I still have time, do you understand? God created you, and you can’t exit this plan. You can’t even explain it to people. They will call you crazy. How many people wrote to me aggressively 5-10 years ago, “Who does he think he is?! What is he trying to make of himself?! How can he know anything?!” They are pushing me into a burning fire. If I talk about it, people will bully me, but I must say it. They make me, do you understand? It is a vicious circle – some kind of mockery. I have nothing to lose, and I am dead already. Seriously. I have always said that. You have attachments, dreams, fears, desires, and people you think of. My only hope was this year 2023. I always thought if nothing would happen, I would give up. How long can I endure?
I know how to live an everyday life. I love dogs and my farm. I love fishing. Not eating fish but just the process of fishing. But I can’t do that. I am not allowed. Nothing is allowed. If I stopped writing and publicizing, they would arrange troubles for me and my relatives to frighten and scold me. They would create problems to return me to writing. Can you imagine? It is oppression, like in jail. People think that I have narcissism and my life is posh. I say that my selfishness is 100% less than your narcissism. Seriously. I don’t have it at all. It is not my