Page 406

[Alexandr Korol]

And it’s so interesting — he had told me, just recently, when I called him, when
the Spirit was speaking with me through him — back then he said that the time has
come. He said back then that when I do this, I will then have to think about what
life I want. And so, as it were, that is just how it is. When I leave now, I won’t have
anywhere to put my attention, since it will be fully freed, as if at the beginning of
something new. And, besides putting on some kind of music for myself on a new
phone, which will be completely empty, I will pick up a notebook with a pen, or
the notes on the phone, and I will, as if newborn, as if from scratch, like an alien,
start building my life from the beginning.

A month ago I did this experiment: I imagined what if I could right now send a
message with my consciousness to myself, to the version of me that was in the
past — that is, to my young self, to me at twenty, let’s say — what would I send?
And I drew up a list: what to do and not do for that version of myself, the one who
is still young, still twenty there. And then I also attuned myself to hear what I,
from the future, would advise the version of me that I am right now. And I drew
up that list too, a month ago. And on this list — the me from the future advised
me, a month ago, a very strange recommendation. The recommendation was that,
urgently, as the very first thing, before anything else, I should designate a separate
team of employees who would start selling off all my things. So that I would take
this money for myself. And that this is urgent. Well — and, naturally, the things
I would be selling — well, what do I have to sell? Books and all kinds of merch.
And also, for some reason, that I should be saving up all the money. And here I
remember this, because, of course, I didn’t do it — but maybe this was all leading
to this. After all, if I cannot take anything old over there into the new world, the
only thing is whatever money I leave with — and that’s it. And when it runs out, I
can no longer take anything more — so it turns out, however much money I have
right now, that’s how much I have. I didn’t prepare for this. Well — it’s not scary.
But maybe that is what the meaning of that message from my future self was.

It’s interesting how this will look physically — me leaving and disappearing.
Neither you nor I can understand how all of this is set up. Let’s suppose, six
months from now I’m walking down the street. And what? Someone recognizes
me? And I’ll be saying that all of this is my past life, that I don’t know anything,